nevermind
got called into a meeting at work where they basically gave me the ultimatum of go full time (full time at this place is awful, that's why I wasn't doing it) or resign. Cool way to start the new year I love having to job hunt randomly on a tuesday. This year sucks. Also great to have to start job hunting right after dumping several hundred dollars into my car. Very cool.
I left work after that meeting. I'm not going to tell them I'm resigning, because I'll deal with part time until I find a new job, and I don't have the money to just not have a job right now.
I really thought today was the turn around point. It's whatever, I'm unhappy and mad but whatever. Fuck everything. I'm sticking around but I'm gonna complain about it.